[ The look Bucky gives him is one of sympathy and understanding. He'd feel the same. Hell, he had when that Steve who hadn't known him had been here briefly. This place is cruel in the worst ways sometimes. ]
Yeah. That was... a lot of the time memories don't line up here. People remember things that other people haven't experienced yet, but that was... really off.
[ Bucky knows it. He's been here so many times. He always comes back and stays only long enough for Bucky to think he finally gets to have Steve here. ]
Maybe next time he'll be taller and he'll stay for more than two minutes.
[ The corner of his lip quirks up, but really he does get it. Sam probably has a better idea than most other people what Steve really means to Bucky and he knows Steve means a lot to him, too. He's not sure Steve really knows how to have a casual friendship, anyway. ]
He's one drug trafficking charge away from felony bingo between all the dumb shit he pulled back in the 40s and all the dumb shit he's been pulling lately. He might even be more wanted than I am.
[ But then Bucky had never been the bad influence between the two of them. He'd been a good kid. Most of the trouble he'd gotten into had been a result of following after Steve. ]
[ It's a wry smile he throws at Sam. There's really no denying that Sam's been good for Steve. He's looked out for him in ways that Bucky can't and times when he couldn't and no matter how much shit they give each other, that will always be important. ]
[ but honestly? that's never been his big concern with steve. they're similar enough that sam knows that if he wasn't around, steve would do it all on his own. and it's that reason that makes sam stay.
he dangles the glass once more, peering at the liquid. ]
I know it does. I can think of at least half a dozen times just for me.
[ Bucky knows the truth, of course. He's saved Steve from a lot of black eyes and fat lips, but Steve's the one who saves Bucky's life over and over again. ]
[ which makes him doubt the connection now that he's here. he's relatively new and well . . . it's easy to doubt when you're away from the things that mattered. ]
Don't worry. There's plenty of time for you to do dumb things.
[ He bumps his shoulder into Sam's gently, because of course he'll have Sam's back until Steve shows up again. Maybe they're not quite friends in the way they both are with Steve, but he knows Sam is a good guy and he's good for Steve. It means a lot in Bucky's book. ]
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[ but sam raises his glass to him, before taking another sip. ]
You'd think being on the run would help me cope better. I guess I didn't realize how hard it could be.
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[ Bucky smiles at him sadly. ]
Running just keeps getting harder the longer you do it. It wears you down.
[ And of course Bucky feels a little responsible for Sam's having to run. ]
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It's not like I had a lot going for me back home. And like hell I'm buying into registration.
[ that's a big no, with or without steve. not that sam doubted for a moment. his gaze droops a little. ]
Still. It had hurt — A lot. When Steve didn't know who I was.
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Yeah. That was... a lot of the time memories don't line up here. People remember things that other people haven't experienced yet, but that was... really off.
[ He takes a sip of his drink. ]
I'm sorry.
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S'alright. Just took me longer to bounce back.
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[ Bucky knows it. He's been here so many times. He always comes back and stays only long enough for Bucky to think he finally gets to have Steve here. ]
Maybe next time he'll be taller and he'll stay for more than two minutes.
[ The corner of his lip quirks up, but really he does get it. Sam probably has a better idea than most other people what Steve really means to Bucky and he knows Steve means a lot to him, too. He's not sure Steve really knows how to have a casual friendship, anyway. ]
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Yeah, good luck pinning that asshole down.
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[ But then Bucky had never been the bad influence between the two of them. He'd been a good kid. Most of the trouble he'd gotten into had been a result of following after Steve. ]
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I'm shocked. It's not like Steve dragged me off to go rebel against the government or anything.
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[ It's a wry smile he throws at Sam. There's really no denying that Sam's been good for Steve. He's looked out for him in ways that Bucky can't and times when he couldn't and no matter how much shit they give each other, that will always be important. ]
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[ but honestly? that's never been his big concern with steve. they're similar enough that sam knows that if he wasn't around, steve would do it all on his own. and it's that reason that makes sam stay.
he dangles the glass once more, peering at the liquid. ]
But it probably works the other way around too.
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[ Bucky knows the truth, of course. He's saved Steve from a lot of black eyes and fat lips, but Steve's the one who saves Bucky's life over and over again. ]
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[ which makes him doubt the connection now that he's here. he's relatively new and well . . . it's easy to doubt when you're away from the things that mattered. ]
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[ He bumps his shoulder into Sam's gently, because of course he'll have Sam's back until Steve shows up again. Maybe they're not quite friends in the way they both are with Steve, but he knows Sam is a good guy and he's good for Steve. It means a lot in Bucky's book. ]
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Hey, that's never been my thing and you damn well know it.