[ Everything about him is defensive, even if a lot of the details hit close to home. It's too close. It's too much like a lie he'd tell someone like him to earn their trust and he doesn't want to think that of her, but it's too hard not to let the thought occur to him, because he can't think about what's ethical where HYDRA's concerned. It's exactly what HYDRA would do, even if he's not so sure what she'd have to gain. ]
Because... they made me watch, once. When they did it to someone else.
[Her head dips, looking down at her hands, unsure what else to say, and fighting the urge that wants to either reach out and touch or run. It's contentious and it hurts and she shifts, discomfort clear when she finally looks up at him. Blue eyes unsure, almost apologetic, but the intention, the weight of what she means is there too.
HYDRA hadn't tortured her in the same way that Ivan had. Handcuffs and pain until she screamed, until the others could hear her, and it all faded into this distant numbness. Just something to be expected. Another part of training. But they did things that were worse. Things that she didn't think she could ever forget.]
[ His face is a mask now. Or he tries to make it one, but little things slip through--a mix of fear and hope. How could they not when he's not sure how to feel?
She's being honest with him in a way he's not sure he would be in her shoes. Hell, he knows he's not, because he's got a huge secret he's been holding over Tony Stark's head for months and he's got no plans to spill a single bean on any of it. ]
If I didn't tell you, that takes away your choice.
[Her answer is quiet, soft but earnest. She's not much of a spy, not really. Ava's never been like Natasha, however much that was what they tried to make her into. She's more the stubborn soldier than anything. Too direct, cares too much.
She only keeps the things that she has to. The things that offer nothing but hurt. This felt like a truth she owed him. At the question, she pauses, considers the question.]
I want to get to know you.
[It's simple but true. If they were someplace else, she might have said something about seeing if they could be friends, but this place makes things not quite so simple.]
[ It's a respectful answer. He wants it to be an honest one. Not a lot of people have gone out of their way to make sure Bucky has choices, even the people who've treated him alright haven't thought about him in quite those terms. ]
Okay.
[ He isn't saying he's going to let any of his walls down, but if she wants to get to know him, there's some surface stuff he doesn't hold too close to his chest. ]
[She considers the question, then she smiles softly, looks over at him with something a little like interest. Her hands touching her drink, taking a sip, now that she's not quite so weighed down with that tether, with the truth.]
Could make a game of it. Take turns asking questions, but you have to offer something equivalent.
[Not a game she'd created; that had been Sana. Back when Ava had been quiet and guarded and unwilling to give anything away. It makes it safe, keeps from pushing too deep.]
I like drawing, I think I like dancing and I like sparring as long as I don't hurt anyone. What do you enjoy doing, here or- just in general?
[An example, something that's in theory an easy answer, even if her own isn't. The game had also been a way to sort of put rules on basic conversation, because just out of the safehouse Ava hadn't really been good at it. Sana was smarter than people ever gave her credit for.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ Everything about him is defensive, even if a lot of the details hit close to home. It's too close. It's too much like a lie he'd tell someone like him to earn their trust and he doesn't want to think that of her, but it's too hard not to let the thought occur to him, because he can't think about what's ethical where HYDRA's concerned. It's exactly what HYDRA would do, even if he's not so sure what she'd have to gain. ]
no subject
[Her head dips, looking down at her hands, unsure what else to say, and fighting the urge that wants to either reach out and touch or run. It's contentious and it hurts and she shifts, discomfort clear when she finally looks up at him. Blue eyes unsure, almost apologetic, but the intention, the weight of what she means is there too.
HYDRA hadn't tortured her in the same way that Ivan had. Handcuffs and pain until she screamed, until the others could hear her, and it all faded into this distant numbness. Just something to be expected. Another part of training. But they did things that were worse. Things that she didn't think she could ever forget.]
I couldn't not tell you.
no subject
[ His face is a mask now. Or he tries to make it one, but little things slip through--a mix of fear and hope. How could they not when he's not sure how to feel?
She's being honest with him in a way he's not sure he would be in her shoes. Hell, he knows he's not, because he's got a huge secret he's been holding over Tony Stark's head for months and he's got no plans to spill a single bean on any of it. ]
What do you want now?
no subject
[Her answer is quiet, soft but earnest. She's not much of a spy, not really. Ava's never been like Natasha, however much that was what they tried to make her into. She's more the stubborn soldier than anything. Too direct, cares too much.
She only keeps the things that she has to. The things that offer nothing but hurt. This felt like a truth she owed him. At the question, she pauses, considers the question.]
I want to get to know you.
[It's simple but true. If they were someplace else, she might have said something about seeing if they could be friends, but this place makes things not quite so simple.]
no subject
Okay.
[ He isn't saying he's going to let any of his walls down, but if she wants to get to know him, there's some surface stuff he doesn't hold too close to his chest. ]
What do you want to know?
no subject
Could make a game of it. Take turns asking questions, but you have to offer something equivalent.
[Not a game she'd created; that had been Sana. Back when Ava had been quiet and guarded and unwilling to give anything away. It makes it safe, keeps from pushing too deep.]
I like drawing, I think I like dancing and I like sparring as long as I don't hurt anyone. What do you enjoy doing, here or- just in general?
[An example, something that's in theory an easy answer, even if her own isn't. The game had also been a way to sort of put rules on basic conversation, because just out of the safehouse Ava hadn't really been good at it. Sana was smarter than people ever gave her credit for.]