IC Inbox - Duplicity

[lednikovyy]

Comments

[etch]

[sometimes he really does wonder why he calls bucky his friend.]

Shut up and help me find somewhere nice to take her.

[how's that for typing?]

[lednikovyy]

okay. are you trying to get to know her or are you trying to have sex with her?

[ Look at him, asking helpful questions! ]

[etch]

What do you think?

[actually, no. he doesn't want to know what he thinks.]

Should I take her to a restaurant, or should I cook?

[lednikovyy]

you should take her to a restaurant because no one wants 1940s cooking anymore. trust me.

[ No really, even Bucky doesn't want it. ]

just wear a tight shirt and ask her questions about herself. the shirt is the important part.

[etch]

I wouldn't do that to her. They have premade meals in the grocery store.

[because he's still trying to get used to the fact that they don't have to live off of rations anymore.]

I should've known it was a back idea to ask you for advice. You're ridiculous.

[where ridiculous really means "an asshole but i still love you anyway"]

[lednikovyy]

how is that bad advice? it's exactly what I would do and the tight shirt looks a lot better on you, which is unfair because you won't even take advantage of it.

people like talking about themselves. they like feeling like other people are interested in them. ask her about herself. smile. be yourself, because if someone doesn't like that, they're not worth your time. happy?

I've had sex once in the last 70 years, by the way, so I don't know what quality of advice you were expecting here.

[etch]

[he makes a point of ignoring the first part because, alright, bucky may have come through for him in the end. the advice is something he can actually work with, this time.]

Happy.

[now to just remember how to be himself.]

Do you need me to ask her if she has a friend?

[lednikovyy]

low blow.

I can get my own dates. I'm 3/4 of a reasonably attractive guy and there have to be at least a few ladies around who will be into the metal arm/tragic past thing.

[ Or fellows, but he's not broaching that topic just yet. ]

[etch]

I'd say you're more 4/5. Though you're still 100% an ass.

[lednikovyy]

all I got out of that message is that I have a nice ass. thanks.

[etch]

[the response has him laughing, and it's abrupt enough that he has to take a moment to apologize to the woman nearby who he'd just made jump.]

One day I'll remember why we're friends.

[lednikovyy]

shit now you have memory problems, too? hit your head?

then I guess you forgot that you owe me money. a lot of it.

[etch]

Maybe I wanted to try and forget you telling me about your sex life. I must have hit my head a little harder than I thought.

[lednikovyy]

what sex life?
(the kids call that a self-burn)

[etch]

They call it a what?

[lednikovyy]

[ Oh, no. ]

a burn is an insult. so I insulted myself because I don't have a sex life to tell you about.

[etch]

Why would you need to insult yourself? That's what I'm here for.

[lednikovyy]

but I'm so much better at it.

[etch]

I guess you have had a lot of practice.

[lednikovyy]

[ Steve really has no idea how true that is and Bucky's going to do everything he can to keep it that way. ]

I have more experience meeting other me's. I'd tell you that you get used to it, but even I'm not that crazy yet.

[etch]

How many are you at now?

[lednikovyy]

two and neither of them have been from Brooklyn, which makes me wonder if they aren't all evil.

[etch]

Wait, where are they from?

Don't say New Jersey.

[lednikovyy]

Indiana. not sure if that's better or worse. plus I don't trust anyone who hates the Dodgers. other me is shifty.

[ Except that he's probably the one person Bucky really trusts here other than Steve. Other than that, he's shifty as hell. ]

[etch]

I guess that answers the question of who's the evil twin.